Sunday, February 12, 2012

So it's been awhile...

Okay, Okay it's been awhile since I posted on my blog. I'm still here...really. I always have the best intentions of blogging more and then feel like I have nothing witty to add.

A lot has happened since...well last June (really June...that long since the last blog...sigh) But not too much exciting stuff important enough to share. I'll just hit some highlights.

First, one major thing is we took a family vacation on a cruise. It was supposed to be relaxing. Unfortunately, by the end I was ready to be home. Joshua did not do as well as I had hoped. He was overwhelmed most of the time and didn't help that the weather sucked and swimming wasn't always an option because of that and what else is there to do on a cruise ship with kids if you aren't swimming. Most nights he refused to be dropped off at the kids club whereas Emily was there until 10pm. She still asks me to this day when she will see her BFF Priscilla that she met on the cruise ship. The stark differences between the two of them is hard to watch sometimes. It is too sets of extremes. I have Joshua who is happy by himself playing and Emily who makes BFF every where she goes. So anyways we survived that trip.

Joshua had to switch tracks mid-year because of his pyscho teacher who verbally abused him. I was so livid when I found out and hurt and sad. You send your kids off to school hoping that they will be okay. I let the leash out quite a bit and trust those in his care. I learned I should have been more involved. His new teacher is great and caring and understanding. However, I'm so done with this school and fortunately God has blessed us and we get to change schools next year and Joshua will go to a new school with his best friend. None of this would have happened had it not been for the incident with the idiot teacher just reaffirms my faith that God is always at work.

Speaking of God...I am a Christian and hope to raise my children to love God and be faithful to His word. I'm trying to come to terms with how Joshua's autism and my faith intersect. I can't help but question God and why he makes it so hard for me to go to church and worship. It is painful and heartbreaking taking Joshua to Church because he resists it every step of the way. He says all the way I hate church I don't want to go. Dragging him in and having to leave him in his class while he hangs on me and not letting go. I don't know it's just very hard to deal with. I think it's so hard seeing the differences between him and all of the other kids. The weekly church battle is so emotionally draining some days I just don't feel emotionally strong enough to deal with it.

In other news for those who have been following the potty saga...not much has changed. He still has accidents and it's so frustrating. I've been praying about this since he was 3. I'm at my breaking point and don't know how much more I can deal with.

We booked a trip for May to go to Florida for a week. We'll be staying at a resort and plan on going to Legoland one day, seaworld one day and Magic Kingdom one day. We'll be traveling with the in-laws. Joshua is excited about LegoLand but I showed him pictures of Magic Kingdom and he said he doesn't want to go there. I thought about it and decided that he doesn't have to go. He's going to hang out with the grandparents and we are just going to take Emily. He hates rides, loud noises, and crowds so what's the point. He'll be happier at the resort at the pool. Part of me feels sad about this, what kid doesn't want to go to disney world. Well, my kid. On the other hand I'm actually pretty excited to have a typical day with my typical daughter going to Disney world. (I made the mistake of telling her about it) Everyday she asks when will we be at Disney World and she's telling everyone we're going to disney world. It's going to be so much fun with her. She LOVES riding rides. If she is tall enough she'll get on the ride, this girl has no fear. NONE.

That's all I got today folks, not a lot of wittiness today to offer you maybe something funny will happen this week to share :P.